Lowewood Academy

I had cause to remember this week that in loco parentis is a very flexible term. The effect of mine and Dan’s midnight wanderings had some unexpected repercussions, proving that trouble has a habit not only of coming at you from all directions but sometimes sneaking under your guard and punching you in the stomach. Rather like Dan thumped Richard actually.

The week started well, with me (Praise God!) winning the drama prize for my performance in ‘The Boyfriend’. I was so relieved at the 200 house points that came with the silver cup, and the fact that my strap-marked bottom wouldn’t be getting another dose from Richard, that I singularly failed to take any pleasure at all in actually getting a prize! Mr S announced it in assembly and I had to go up and take the cup, which I did red-faced and shy, managing to say thank you nicely at least. There was a huge relief in seeing the Dashwood tally go up though, and for us to sprint into the lead for only the second time this year over Wilkes. Seeing as I’d also earned an additional sixty points for various pieces of schoolwork (Lord Fawcett’s warning and my imminent tea with him weighing heavily on me), I felt like I’d paid the price for the illicit night out at the Black Cat Club.

So it was a bit of a surprise when Mr Woodstock sent me a note, summoning me to the gym at 8pm. Mr Woodstock is, along with Miss Lesbos, one of the junior games teachers. Lowewood is (in my opinion) over-endowed with teachers of the dreaded physical activity, but games are taken seriously here (one of the reasons we get a lot of boys in sixth-form, notwithstanding the opportunities to smack girls bottoms…), with Mr S muttering on about healthy bodies equalling healthy minds. I was fully expecting to be pulled up for failing to show sufficient enthusiasm for the 100m sprint – funnily enough, I’m a good sprinter, no doubt from all the running away from trouble that I do. However, what he brought up took me by surprise.

(more…)

The news I received after the final performance of The Boyfriend came right out of the blue. The musical had proved to be a roaring success, and even Rev. Jenkins seemed to be in a good mood. He even turned a blind eye to the fact that there was more than just fruit juice in the fruit punch. Either that or he simply hadn’t realised.

“A Godly performance!” he bellowed at Dan, slapping the guy so hard on the back that he coughed. “Worthy of the Lord himself!”

In fact, to the casual observer, unaware of Lowewood and the idiosyncrasies of its staff, the way in which he congratulated the girls would have appeared almost ‘flirty’. At the end of the night, as I left the main hall for my study, I could hear his voice above all others.

“I say, there’s a jolly interesting kick to this fruit punch! What’s the secret ingredient? Lemon zest?”

It had been a good show. The best news of all came when Mr Shaftebotham announced that the drama prize for the year would go to Jessica Davies. The two hundred house points this merited were enough for Dashwood to overtake Wilkes. Good old Jessica – I always said she was a good egg.

I entered my study and found Gina waiting for me. And that was when I received the news. It was the type of news that by rights should have been upsetting and humiliating – but my primary feeling was of sexual arousal.

(more…)

Upper Sixth Leavers Ball

Mr Shaftebotham is please to announce that, the following Lower Sixth pupils will form the committee to plan and run the Upper Sixth Leavers Ball which will take place on Wednesday the 25th of July.

Byron:  Maria Marten, Peter Baker
Dashwood: Georgina Henshaw, Jessica Davies
Sandwich: Catherine Lamplugh, Simon Maxwell
Wilkes:  Herbert Berkley, Cecil McAndrew

These pupils will attend a short introductory meeting today at 3.30pm in the Headmaster’s study.

I looked glumly at the notice board with Emma. We were both silent, reading the notice. Eventually, Emma summed up the situation.

“Bloody hell. Unbelievable!”

I scowled at the notice. “Too right! What a bloody shower.”

(more…)